Saturday 8 July 2023

MY DEAR PAPA


MY DEAR PAPA

by Caitlin Fladager 

Dear dad, aka “papa”.
When I first found out I was pregnant at 18, I wasn’t scared to tell anyone. Only you.
I wasn’t scared to tell friends, other family, or the internet. I was scared to tell you.
I still remember sitting on my bed with mom, when you walked in and asked why I was crying. I could barely get out the words “I’m pregnant dad..” before you hung your head in disappointment, and stormed off downstairs. Mom hugged me and told me that you would come around.
I gave you a few minutes, and I walked downstairs. You were sitting on the couch. You looked so mad. I couldn’t find the words to say anything to you, so I just sat down beside you, and laid my head down on your shoulder, as I felt tears drip down my face.
Out of all the people I had to tell, that I was pregnant, I was most scared to tell you. And you were definitely the most disappointed.
But, when I came home the next day, and I saw you clearing out the guest room, for your soon to be granddaughter, I knew everything would be okay.
Six months later, you took me to every doctors appointment, when my boyfriend was working.
Seven months later, you helped me pick out a bringing home baby outfit.
Eight months later, you were there through my labour, and reminding me I could do this.
When she was born, you wouldn’t let her go. She became your world, along with me.
Six years later, you, papa, are my daughters world. She wants to call you every chance she gets. She wants to see you every time we go anywhere.
I know that out of everyone, you were the most disappointed when I announced I was pregnant at 18, but my daughter and I, couldn’t imagine doing life without you. And I know that you couldn’t imagine doing life without my daughter.
You two needed each other, even if you didn’t know it back then.

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