Wednesday, 4 October 2023

WHEN WE LOOK


"WHEN WE LOOK"
(author unknown)

My husband gifted me with a quiet getaway in the country last Mother’s Day. I arrived on a Friday afternoon and basked in the peaceful silence the entire first day and night.
But the next morning, I heard a flicker at the kitchen window. Upon closer inspection, I found that a wasp had somehow crawled inside the window and was buzzing behind the blinds. After about 20 minutes of psyching myself up and finally smashing the wasp with a scream, 😂 I patted myself on the back and returned to my solitude.
About 20 minutes later, a fresh wasp appeared behind the same blinds…a wasp I knew wasn’t there when I killed the first one. I immediately imagined myself killing wasps for the rest of the weekend. THEN I imagined a wasp stinging me while I slept.
So I did the only reasonable thing a grown adult can do - I messaged the owners of the cottage and asked if they had any wasp spray, hoping they would come to my rescue. 🤣 They replied that they would be there in a few hours to help.
And so…I waited.
And while I waited, I heard EV-ER-Y-THING. While the wasp itself wasn’t making much noise at all, I SWORE I heard it buzz hundreds of times.
Then I saw it fly across the room. Or at least, I THOUGHT I did. But when I returned to the kitchen window, the wasp was still there.
THEN I started to feel it crawling on me. Except…it wasn’t crawling on me at all.
Then the owners arrived, killed the wasp, and sealed up the window to prevent further intruders…and I suddenly didn’t hear or see or feel a single thing again. I went from pure paranoia of every tiny sound to ignorant bliss of the sounds I should have otherwise noticed.
And it really struck me that we find what we look for.
When we look for wasps, we find them.
When we look for drama, we find it.
When we look for our friends’ and family members’ faults, we find them.
When we look for evidence that the world is a terrible place, we find it.
When we hyper-fixate on ANYTHING, our brain will look for evidence to support our theory. It will nit-pick every situation, every word, every sound to say, “See?! I TOLD you so!”
But the inverse can also be true! Because our brains are just as capable of looking for the good in every situation.
When we look for peace and quiet, we find it.
When we look for our friends’ and family members’ best qualities, we find them.
When we look for the goodness in the world, we find it.
And when we look for reasons to feel thankful and blessed and grateful to be alive, we find them.
We find what we look for. So be sure to look for the things you actually WANT to find.

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