Friday 23 June 2023

What does it feel like to be old?

 


What does it feel like to be old?
(author unknown)

The other day, a young person asked me.

What did it feel like to be old?
I was very surprised by the question, since I did not consider myself old. When he saw my reaction, he was immediately embarrassed, but I explained that it was an interesting question. And after reflection, I concluded that getting old is a gift.

Sometimes I am surprised at the person who lives in my mirror. But I don't worry about those things for long. I wouldn't trade everything I have for a few less gray hairs and a flat stomach. I don't scold myself for not making the bed, or for eating a few extra "little things." I am within my rights to be a little messy, to be extravagant, and to spend hours staring at my flowers.

I have seen some dear friends leave this world, before they had enjoyed the freedom that comes with growing old.
-Who cares if I choose to read or play on the computer until 4 in the morning and then sleep until who knows what time?

I will dance with me to the rhythm of the 50's and 60's. And if later I want to cry for some lost love...I will!

I'll walk down the beach in a swimsuit that stretches over my plump body and dive into the waves letting myself go, despite the pitying looks of the bikini-wearers. They'll get old too, if they're lucky...

It is true that through the years my heart has ached for the loss of a loved one, for the pain of a child, or for seeing a pet die. But it is suffering that gives us strength and makes us grow. An unbroken heart is sterile and will never know the happiness of being imperfect.
I am proud to have lived long enough for my hair to turn grey and to retain the smile of my youth, before the deep furrows appeared on my face.
Now, to answer the question honestly, I can say: -I like being old, because old age makes me wiser, freer!

I know I'm not going to live forever, but while I'm here, I'm going to live by my own laws, those of my heart.

I'm not going to regret what wasn't, nor worry about what will be.
The time that remains, I will simply love life as I did until today, the rest I leave to God.


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HEALTH, SUCCESS AND LOVE

 


HEALTH, SUCCESS AND LOVE
(author unknown)

"Once in a village, a woman saw three old men sitting outside her house. They were sitting there for quite a while.
The woman went outside and said,
'I don't know you, but I saw that you are sitting here for long, you must be hungry. Please come in and have something to eat.'
One of them asked,
'Is the man of the house at home ?'
She replied, 'No.'
'Then we cannot come in.', said the men.
The woman went inside. In the evening when her husband came, she told him about the people sitting outside and all that had happened.
He told his wife to go and ask those men to come in and have some food.
She went out and told them,
'My husband is home. He is inviting you all. Please come inside and have some food with us .'
They replied,
'We do not go inside a house together.'
When she asked why, one of the old men explained,
pointing to one of his friends, he said :
'His name is Wealth.
If he goes with you, your home will be filled with wealth always.'
Then pointing to another old man he said :
'He is Success.
If he goes with you, you will always be successful in any endeavour you start.'
He then introduced himself as Love.
'If I go with you, then your home will be filled with love always.'
Then he told her to go in and discuss with her husband which one of them they want in their home.
Her husband was overjoyed hearing about it and said,
'Let’s invite Wealth.
Let him come and fill our home with wealth.'
His wife disagreed and said, 'Why don’t we invite Success?'
Their daughter-in-law was listening to this.
She came to them and suggested,
'Wouldn’t it be better if we invite Love in our home ?
Then our home will be filled with love forever.'
The husband and wife agreed.
The woman again went out and said,
'Which one of you is Love ? Please come in and be our guest.'
Love got up and started walking toward the house. Just then the other two also got up and started following him.
The woman asked,
'You said you can not all can come together.
I invited only Love.
Why are you all coming in?'
The old men replied,
'If you had invited Wealth or Success then the other two would have stayed outside, but since you invite Love, wherever he goes, we go with him.'
Wherever there is Love, Wealth and Success will follow."

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THE BLONDE ON A PLANE



THE BLONDE ON A PLANE
(author unknown)

A Plane Is On Its Way To Toronto , When A Blonde In Economy Class Gets Up And Moves To The First Class Section And Sits Down.
The Flight Attendant Watches Her Do This And Asks To See Her Ticket.
She Then Tells The Blonde That She Paid For Economy Class And That She Will Have To Sit In The Back.

The Blonde Replies, "I'm Blonde, I'm Beautiful, I'm Going To Toronto And I'm Staying Right Here."

The Flight Attendant Goes Into The Cockpit And Tells The Pilot And The Co-pilot That There Is A Blonde Bimbo Sitting In First Class, That Belongs In Economy And Won't Move Back To Her Seat.

The Co-pilot Goes Back To The Blonde And Tries To Explain That Because She Only Paid For Economy She Will Have To Leave And Return To Her Seat.

The Blonde Replies, "I'm Blonde, I'm Beautiful, I'm Going To Toronto And I'm Staying Right Here."

The Co-pilot Tells The Pilot That He Probably Should Have The Police Waiting When They Land To Arrest This Blonde Woman Who Won't Listen To Reason.

The Pilot Says, "You Say She Is A Blonde? I'll
Handle This, I'm Married To A Blonde. I Speak Blonde."

He Goes Back To The Blonde And Whispers In Her Ear, And She Says, "Oh, I'm Sorry." And Gets Up And Goes Back To Her Seat In Economy.

The Flight Attendant And Co-pilot Are Amazed And Asked Him What He Said To Make Her Move Without Any Fuss.

"I Told Her, 'first Class Isn't Going To Toronto."


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CHARLEY THE NEW GREETER

 


CHARLEY THE NEW GREETER
( author unknown)

Charley, a new retiree-greeter at Wal-Mart, just couldn't seem to get to work on time. Every day he was 5, 10, 15 minutes late. But he was a good worker, really tidy, clean-shaven, sharp-minded and a real credit to the company and obviously demonstrating their "Older Person Friendly" policies.
One day the boss called him into the office for a talk. "Charley, I have to tell you, I like your work ethic, you do a bang-up job when you finally get here; but your being
late so often is quite bothersome."
"Yes, I know boss, and I am working on it."
"Well good, you are a team player. That's what I like to hear".
"Yes sir, I understand your concern and I will try harder".
Seeming puzzled, the manager went on to comment, "I know you're retired from the Armed Forces. What did they say to you
there if you showed up in the morning late so often?"
The old man looked down at the floor, then smiled. He chuckled quietly, then said with a grin, "They usually saluted and said,
Good morning, Admiral, can I get your coffee, sir"?

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COWS DON'T GIVE MILK, YOU HAVE TO WORK FOR IT

 


COWS DON'T GIVE MILK,
YOU HAVE TO WORK FOR IT
(author unknown)

A father used to say to his children when they were young: —When you all reach the age of 12 I will tell you the secret of life. One day when the oldest turned 12, he anxiously asked his father what was the secret of life. The father replied that he was going to tell him, but that he should not reveal it to his brothers.
—The secret of life is this: The cow does not give milk. "What are you saying?" Asked the boy incredulously. —As you hear it, son: The cow does not give milk, you have to milk it. You have to get up at 4 in the morning, go to the field, walk through the corral full of manure, tie the tail, hobble the legs of the cow, sit on the stool, place the bucket and do the work yourself.
That is the secret of life, the cow does not give milk. You milk her or you don't get milk. There is this generation that thinks that cows GIVE milk. That things are automatic and free: their mentality is that if "I wish, I ask..... I obtain."

"They have been accustomed to get whatever they want the easy way...But no, life is not a matter of wishing, asking and obtaining. The things that one receives are the effort of what one does. Happiness is the result of effort. Lack of effort creates frustration."
So, share with your children from a young age the secret of life, so they don't grow up with the mentality that the government, their parents, or their cute little faces is going to give them everything they need in life.

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An Atheist and The Cowboy

 


An Atheist and The Cowboy
brought to you by THE CORNER 4 WOMEN


An atheist was seated next to a dusty old cowboy on an airplane and he turned to him and said, “Do you want to talk? 

Flights go quicker if you strike up a conversation with your fellow passenger.”

The old cowboy, who had just started to read his book, replied to the total stranger, “What would you want to talk about?”

“Oh, I don’t know,” said the atheist. “How about why there is no God, or no Heaven or Hell, or no life after death?” as he smiled smugly.

“Okay,” he said. “Those could be interesting topics but let me ask you a question first. A horse, a cow, and a deer all eat the same stuff – grass. Yet a deer excretes little pellets, while a cow turns out a flat patty, but a horse produces clumps. Why do you suppose that is?”

The atheist, visibly surprised by the old cowboy's intelligence, thinks about it and says, “Hmmm, I have no idea.”

To which the cowboy replies, “Do you really feel qualified to discuss God, Heaven and Hell, or life after death, when you don’t know crap?”

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IN THE LAND THAT MADE ME, ME



IN THE LAND THAT MADE ME, ME
Brought to you by THE CORNER 4 WOMEN


Long ago and far away, in a land that time forgot,
Before the days of Dylan , or the dawn of Camelot.
There lived a race of innocents, and they were you and me.
For Ike was in the White House in that land where we were born,
Where navels were for oranges, and Peyton Place was porn.
We longed for love and romance, and waited for our Prince,
Eddie Fisher married Liz, and no one's seen him since.
We danced to 'Little Darlin,' and sang to 'Stagger Lee'
And cried for Buddy Holly in the Land That Made Me, Me.

Only girls wore earrings then, and 3 was one too many,
And only boys wore flat-top cuts, except for Jean McKinney.
And only in our wildest dreams did we expect to see
A boy named George with Lipstick, in the Land That Made Me, Me.

We fell for Frankie Avalon, Annette was oh, so nice,
And when they made a movie, they never made it twice..
We didn't have a Star Trek Five, or Psycho Two and Three,
Or Rocky-Rambo Twenty in the Land That Made Me, Me.

Miss Kitty had a heart of gold, and Chester had a limp,
And Reagan was a Democrat whose co-star was a chimp.
We had a Mr. Wizard, but not a Mr. T,
And Oprah couldn't talk yet, in the Land That Made Me, Me.
We had our share of heroes, we never thought they'd go,
At least not Bobby Darin, or Marilyn Monroe.
For youth was still eternal, and life was yet to be,
And Elvis was forever in the Land That Made Me, Me.

We'd never seen the rock band that was Grateful to be Dead,
And Airplanes weren't named Jefferson , and Zeppelins were not Led.
And Beatles lived in gardens then, and Monkees lived in trees,
Madonna was Mary in the Land That Made Me, Me.

We'd never heard of microwaves, or telephones in cars,
And babies might be bottle-fed, but they were not grown in jars.
And pumping iron got wrinkles out, and 'gay' meant fancy-free,
And dorms were never co-Ed in the Land That Made Me, Me.

We hadn't seen enough of jets to talk about the lag,
And microchips were what was left at the bottom of the bag.
And hardware was a box of nails, and bytes came from a flea,
And rocket ships were fiction in the Land That Made Me, Me.

T-Birds came with portholes, and side shows came with freaks,
And bathing suits came big enough to cover both your cheeks.
And Coke came just in bottles, and skirts below the knee,
And Castro came to power near the Land That Made Me, Me.

We had no Crest with Fluoride, we had no Hill Street Blues,
We had no patterned pantyhose or Lipton herbal tea
Or prime-time ads for those dysfunctions in the Land That Made Me, Me.

There were no golden arches, no Perrier to chill,
And fish were not called Wanda, and cats were not called Bill
And middle-aged was 35 and old was forty-three,
And ancient were our parents in the Land That Made Me, Me.

But all things have a season, or so we've heard them say,
And now instead of Maybelline we swear by Retin-A.
They send us invitations to join AARP,
We've come a long way, baby, from the Land That Made Me, Me.

So now we face a brave new world in slightly larger jeans,
And wonder why they're using smaller print in magazines.
And we tell our children's children of the way it used to be,
Long ago and far away in the Land That Made Me, Me.

If you didn't grow up in the fifty's,
You missed the greatest time in history,
Hope you enjoyed this read as much as I did.


All reac
102

 

Thursday 22 June 2023

Are You A WAHMy Mammy? If Not, Why Not?

 


Are You A WAHMy Mammy? If Not, Why Not?

By © John A Elliott 2023

 

Ok! Ok ! I hear you saying so what’s a WAHMy? Well to put it simply its an acronym for Work At Home Moms ya’ll. I added the ya’ll to make this more unique.

A little girl came home from school and asked her mother “Are you A WAHMy Mammy?” a bit perplexed and quite bemused, that her precious daughter of six had come out with such a profound statement. “All the other kid’s mom’s at school in my group are WAHMy’s, so are you one mum?” the little girl continued.

“I’m not sure my dear, what’s a WAHMy anyway?” the mother replied.

With hands on her hips and the right foot tapping, as little girls often do, and a small scowl on her young brow, “Moth-errr!” “It’s being a Work At Home Mommy ya’ll of course. Derrr!” and the usual, under the breath “tut”

“Oh right, no my dear in that case I’m not.” Tears welled in her eyes as the young mother’s thoughts drifted to happier times, when they enjoyed the income from her husband’s job, and as a family they could afford everything they needed. Bob her husband was out of state looking for work, and the welfare cheque was barely enough to survive on.

“So my little one, come sit on my knee, and tell mommy all about being a WAHMy, seeing as how you seem to know so much for one so young”
“Ok but Moth-errr, please NO sloppy kisses, I’m growd up now and past all that mushy stuff” The little girl proudly told her mom all about the other children’s mom’s, working from home doing lots of different jobs, and how the other kids mom’s could afford those special treats like they once did, and daddy could come back home again and they’ll all live happily ever after.

Yes little six year olds can certainly come out with the most thought provoking and in depth things at times, as their young minds can be very logical, and not marred by years of preconception’s of what can be achieved and what can’t. There’s an old adage, “Out of the mouth’s of babes” pure thought with no hindrances immerge. The little girl knew nothing of the actual nuances or complexities of working from home for her mother, yet her logic told her this would be ideal, and besides her father could come back again, which in her eyes would be so wonderful as she misses him so very much.

WHY BE A WAHMy?

WAHMy mammy’s choose not to take paid work outside the home, so that their family can be their first priority. Whether you are a single parent or within a partnership, trying so desperately to make ends meet, you could so easily become a WAHMy mammy by utilizing better, the skill’s you already have. Find out how You too can take control of your own finances in such a way as you discover how being a WAHM can provide the flexibility, income generation and personal fulfilment you are seeking, by working from home and releasing your full potential. You owe it to your family to be successful, what better motivation can there be to becoming a WAHMy mammy. The story highlighted above is actually fictional, written by me to illustrate this article, but it could easily be true, it could easily be about you and your own family situation.

WHAT’S THE CATCH?

Now I hear you asking, “Ye right, Ok! So where, how, what’s the catch?..” and my answer in a nutshell, there is no catch, no trick questions, in fact anyone can become a WAHMy or even a WAHDy yes you guessed it a Work At Home Daddy

Everyone has a skill, even something quite basic can be utilized and transformed into a work from home business either locally or globally, it really makes no difference. Selling products from Amazon as an Affiliate for example, you don’t need to bother about carrying or buying and stock, or even worry about shipping. You can build a reasonable mini website free with Google Sites which you can use for any online business.

Don’t think that working from home is going to be a fast, get rich solution to your financial problems, because basically it isn’t, however it is a perfect way to make a little extra each month as a side hustle, just by setting a few hours aside each day to ensure everything is running smoothly.

Of course, you are not limited to just being an Amazon Affiliate. You could easily sell your skills locally too say for Ironing, dog walking, car washing, writing CV’s etc etc

Is today the day you are going to become a WAHMy or a WAHDy?


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"BABY STEPS" by Becky Hemsley

"BABY STEPS" by Becky Hemsley We have to stop thinking that we’ve failed every time we fall. When babies are learning to walk, we ...