WHEN I AM GONE by Becky Hemsley

"WHEN I AM GONE"
by Becky Hemsley

When I am gone, do not fear my memory.

Do not be afraid to speak my name or look through old photographs.

Do not be scared to play old videos so that you might hear my voice and see me laughing.

Do not be wary of visiting my favourite places or eating my favourite foods or singing along to my favourite songs.

I know it will hurt. Those memories will remind you that I am gone.

They will stab at you like a knife in an open, gaping wound. Raw, excruciating pain.

But after a while the knife will become less sharp, the wound will become less open and the pain will become less raw.

And those memories will remind you that I was here.

That I lived.

Do not reduce my life to my death.

Speak my name, hear my voice, sing my favourite songs and visit my favourite places.

Because that’s how I can stay alive a little.

Right here with you

*******

Becky Hemsley 2022 https://www.facebook.com/talkingtothewild

Beautiful image by Eva Koleva Timothy - Fine Art Photography

'When I Am Gone' is from the book of the same name

https://a.co/d/8R8rlinh

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BE A LADY by Camille Rainville

"BE A LADY"
by Camille Rainville

Be a lady they said. Your skirt is too short. Your shirt is too low. Your pants are too tight. Don’t show so much skin. Don’t show your thighs. Don’t show your breasts. Don’t show your midriff. Don’t show your cleavage. Don’t show your underwear. Don’t show your shoulders. Cover up. Leave something to the imagination. Dress modestly. Don’t be a temptress. Men can’t control themselves.

Men have needs. You look frumpy. Loosen up. Show some skin. Look sexy. Look hot. Don’t be so provocative. You’re asking for it. Wear black. Wear heels. You’re too dressed up. You’re too dressed down. Don’t wear those sweatpants; you look like you’ve let yourself go.

Be a lady they said. Don’t be too fat. Don’t be too thin. Don’t be too large. Don’t be too small. Eat up. Slim down. Stop eating so much. Don’t eat too fast. Order a salad. Don’t eat carbs. Skip dessert. You need to lose weight. Fit into that dress. Go on a diet. Watch what you eat. Eat celery. Chew gum. Drink lots of water. You have to fit into those jeans. God, you look like a skeleton. Why don’t you just eat? You look emaciated. You look sick. Eat a burger. Men like women with some meat on their bones. Be small. Be light. Be little. Be petite. Be feminine. Be a size zero. Be a double zero. Be nothing. Be less than nothing.

Be a lady they said. Remove your body hair. Shave your legs. Shave your armpits. Shave your bikini line. Wax your face. Wax your arms. Wax your eyebrows. Get rid of your moustache. Bleach this. Bleach that. Lighten your skin. Tan your skin. Eradicate your scars. Cover your stretch marks. Tighten your abs. Plump your lips. Botox your wrinkles. Lift your face. Tuck your tummy. Thin your thighs. Tone your calves. Perk up your boobs. Look natural. Be yourself. Be genuine. Be confident. You’re trying too hard. You look overdone. Men don’t like girls who try too hard.

Be a lady they said. Wear makeup. Prime your face. Conceal your blemishes. Contour your nose. Highlight your cheekbones. Line your lids. Fill in your brows. Lengthen your lashes. Colour your lips. Powder, blush, bronze, highlight. Your hair is too short. Your hair is too long. Your ends are split. Highlight your hair. Your roots are showing. Dye your hair. Not blue, that looks unnatural. You’re going grey. You look so old. Look young. Look youthful. Look ageless. Don’t get old. Women don’t get old. Old is ugly. Men don’t like ugly.

Be a lady they said. Save yourself. Be pure. Be virginal. Don’t talk about sex. Don’t flirt. Don’t be a skank. Don’t be a whore. Don’t sleep around. Don’t lose your dignity. Don’t have sex with too many men. Don’t give yourself away. Men don’t like sluts. Don’t be a prude. Don’t be so up tight. Have a little fun. Smile more. Pleasure men. Be experienced. Be sexual. Be innocent. Be dirty. Be virginal. Be sexy. Be the cool girl. Don’t be like the other girls.

Be a lady they said. Don’t talk too loud. Don’t talk too much. Don’t take up space. Don’t sit like that. Don’t stand like that. Don’t be intimidating. Why are you so miserable? Don’t be a bitch. Don’t be so bossy. Don’t be assertive. Don’t overact. Don’t be so emotional. Don’t cry. Don’t yell. Don’t swear. Be passive. Be obedient. Endure the pain. Be pleasing. Don’t complain. Let him down easy. Boost his ego. Make him fall for you. Men want what they can’t have. Don’t give yourself away. Make him work for it. Men love the chase. Fold his clothes. Cook his dinner. Keep him happy. That’s a woman’s job. You’ll make a good wife some day. Take his last name. You hyphenated your name? Crazy feminist. Give him children. You don’t want children? You will some day. You’ll change your mind.

Be a lady they said. Don’t get raped. Protect yourself. Don’t drink too much. Don’t walk alone. Don’t go out too late. Don’t dress like that. Don’t show too much. Don’t get drunk. Don’t leave your drink. Have a buddy. Walk where it is well lit. Stay in the safe neighbourhoods. Tell someone where you’re going. Bring pepper spray. Buy a rape whistle. Hold your keys like a weapon. Take a self-defence course. Check your trunk. Lock your doors. Don’t go out alone. Don’t make eye contact. Don’t bat your eyelashes. Don’t look easy. Don’t attract attention. Don’t work late. Don’t crack dirty jokes. Don’t smile at strangers. Don’t go out at night. Don’t trust anyone. Don’t say yes. Don’t say no.

Just “be a lady” they said.

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EXAMS by Becky Hemsley

"EXAMS"
by Becky Hemsley

There are times I’ve been first and times I’ve been last

I’ve aced a distinction, I’ve just scraped a pass

I’ve known every answer that’s been on a test

I’ve sat and I’ve panicked and failed at my desk

I’ve labelled the countries, I’ve dated the wars

I’ve analysed novels and sonnets and more

I’ve been judged by the margins of numbers and letters,

Been told I’ve done well and that I could do better

But I can say this; that I did not learn less

From failure and fault than I did from success

See, we are much more than the answers we give

‘Cause it’s great and it’s grand but it’s messy to live

And we learn so much from this everyday mess

That isn’t included or marked in a test

And when we are gone and they think of our lives

They’ll think of our laugh and the way that we smiled

They’ll think of the memories with us that they treasure

Not grades or our scores or the ways we were measured

But the way that we’d sing and the way that we’d cook

With our head in the clouds or our nose in a book

The way that we loved and the way that we cared

The way that they’ll miss us when we are not there

And not because we got an A or a D,

A first or a last or a one or a three

But because we were funny, because we were kind

That’s how we’ll leave love for those left behind

So when you sit down and you open that test

Yes, read every question and give it your best

But remember, that paper does not define you

So don’t give it that power - whatever you do

*****

Another one for exam season

Becky Hemsley 2022

https://www.facebook.com/talkingtothewild

Beautiful artwork by the inimitable Lisa Aisato

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A MOTHER AND HER DAUGHTER by Joanne Boyle

"A MOTHER AND HER DAUGHTER" by Joanne Boyle

Mother's and Daughters.

I counted your fingers

and then your toes,

as I bent down and kissed

your cute button nose.

A mother's promise was made,

as I held you tight,

that as long as I breathed,

you'd be alright.

I'd accept your decisions

whilst being your guide.

I'd be the ears,

when you were hurting inside.

I'd be your voice

when you could not speak.

I'd be your strength,

when you were weak.

A Mother and her Daughter.

An unbreakable bond.

A hidden magic,

like a magicians wand.

Brought together by blood.

Joined at the heart.

A Mother and her Daughter,

friends from the start.

********

Author Joanne Boyle. Heartfelt by Steffi Krenzek

Somewhere In Between: A Collection of Poems https://amzn.eu/d/2Ibs6dd

Print available heartfeltpoetry.co.uk

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WHEN LOVE CAN NO LONGER SAVE YOU by Joanne Boyle

"WHEN LOVE CAN NO LONGER SAVE YOU"
by Joanne Boyle

When nobody cares how broken you are

or you think they can't understand.

When even the outside feels too small,

and you no longer want a hand.

When the sky feels like it's suffocating

and the ground it hurts your feet.

When the smile becomes a fake hello

for the people that you greet.

When the reasons don't matter

and there's nothing more to give.

When the Empty hole,

becomes the place you want to live.

When everyone around you,

becomes invisible to your eye.

When you are drained of all emotion

with no tears left to cry.

When love can no longer save you

you are in the depths of despair.

You have gone deaf to all the voices,

screaming "hang in there"

Yet the world is still uneducated,

no one knows just what to do,

because if love and listening was enough,

then it would have saved you.

*********

Author Joanne Boyle Heartfelt Art by Steffi Krenzek

Me, You and Mental Health, Too Paperback

https://www.amazon.co.uk/Me-You-

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A MOTHER AND HER BOY by Joanne Boyle

"A MOTHER AND HER BOY"
by Joanne Boyle

A Mother and her Son.

A Mother becomes a warrior,

when her son is born.

Her ballgown is replaced.

Armour is now worn.

No one will hurt her boy,

or break his heart in two.

Every woman that he meets,

will have her to answer to.

A Mother and her Son.

A warrior and her Prince.

The first Scent that he smelt,

and shall remember since.

A Mother and her boy,

whom she will always shield.

Two hearts entwined as one.

A bond of love is sealed.

*********

Author Joanne Boyle Heartfelt art by Steffi Krenzek

https://amzn.eu/d/e6zkdA1

Print available Heartfeltpoetry.co.uk

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MAP OF YOUR LIFE by Tahlia Hunter

"MAP OF YOUR LIFE"
by Tahlia Hunter

"Legend says that

before you were born,

you were given a map of your life.

This map contained the greatest joys, sorrows,

dreams, heartaches and challenges of your life

and the people you would likely encounter

along each step of the path.

But the second that you enter the world,

it is forgotten.

And for each other person in existence,

they too forget their map.

And though at first, it remains invisible,

through each and every encounter with life,

you attempt to recreate

what you have forgotten

but believe to be true

deep within your soul.

And through challenges,

a voice within you tells you to keep moving forward,

for you are an alchemist,

and though bad things may happen,

you can make good things out of them.

And though life is much like chess,

where once you make a move

you cannot unmake it,

it is never too late

for you to recreate the future

through the present moment,

and in doing so,

rewrite the past.

And through tears,

when people exit your life,

a deep wisdom within you tells you

that this is as it must be,

and that one day, you will be reunited.

And that no matter how unlikely it may seem,

them leaving you occurred

for a higher purpose

beyond what you can presently fathom.

And though they may have had to go,

this was a planned part of your path,

for your journey here is merely temporary

and is a small speck within your entire existence.

And you must remember on the map

that each step is not purely defined

by the action you take in the physical world

but what is happening energetically within you:

healing past trauma and wounds

and finding love, forgiveness and acceptance.

And you may trust during times of stillness or inaction

that the arrow is being pulled backwards

so that it can be pulled forwards.

And when love seems to evade you,

you may be reminded of the fact

that you are your own soulmate

before you are someone else's.

And it matters not who exits or enters your life,

for you are your own home,

and on a deeper energetic level,

all are one, as all are connected.

And though you may regret past steps you have taken,

you cannot fault yourself

for getting lost in life

when you had forgotten the map.

But you may trust that you will slowly acquire it

through each experience

and that you will eventually find your way.

And all will make sense in the end,

once you reach the other side.”

********

Words by Tahlia Hunter

https://www.facebook.com/TahliaHunterBlog

Artwork by 이정석, @endmion1 (Instagram), #endmion1

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