Monday, 26 June 2023

THE PRANK

 


THE PRANK
(author unknown)

During a prank, a student stuck a paper on his classmate's back that said "I'm Stupid", and asked the rest of the class not to tell the boy.
Thus the students began laughing on and off...

Came afternoon math class started and their teacher wrote a difficult question on the board.

No one was able to answer it except the boy with the sticker.
Amid the unexplained giggles, he walked toward the board and solved the problem.

The teacher asked the class to clap for him and remove the paper on his back.
She told him: "It seems that you don’t know about the paper your classmate has pasted on your back."

Then the teacher looked at the rest of the class and said:
"Before I give you a punishment, let me tell you 2 things:
First, throughout your Life, people will put labels on you with many nasty words to stop your progress.
Had your classmate known about the paper, he wouldn't have gotten up to answer the question.

All you have to do in Life is ignore the labels people give you and seize every opportunity you have to learn, grow and improve yourself."
"Second, it’s clear that he doesn't have any loyal friend among you all to tell him about the sticker.

It doesn't matter how many friends you have - it is the loyalty you share with your friends that matters.

If you don't have friends who can defend you behind your back, who can watch over you, protect you and who genuinely care about you, you are better off alone....!"
Always have each others back

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A TRIP TO DISNEYWORLD

 



A TRIP TO DISNEYWORLD
author Amy Beth Gardner

Being at Walt Disney World this week has caused me to think back to the first time my husband and I brought the girls to the resort. We had only been their foster parents for a few months when I had a conversation with the oldest child that sent a chill down my spine. Only nine years old, she looked into my eyes and, with sadness breaking through her voice, said “I don’t think I will ever feel joy.” She told me that living with us for the past few months had allowed her to feel safety, security and love but that she couldn’t imagine that she would ever know what it would feel like to experience joy. In that moment, watching a child I loved assume that joy was too far gone for her to grasp, I knew exactly what to do.
I booked a trip to the Walt Disney World Resort.
I made hotel and ticket reservations as fast as I could. I combed through the lists of rides in each of the theme parks and made a coordinating list of Disney films to have the girls “randomly” watch so that they would recognize characters that, at that time, were foreign to them. I stalked dining reservations until I finally secured breakfast with the princesses and booked two spots at the Bibbidi Bobbidi Boutique. Finally, one October evening with our video camera rolling, my husband and I handed them bags containing personalized t-shirts and Minnie Mouse ears and told them to put their shoes on because we had to catch the first flight of their young lives – to Walt Disney World.
The Magic Kingdom had the desired effect on my youngest daughter from the time we walked through the front gates. She looked like any other five year old girl experiencing Walt Disney World for the first time as she ran from ride to ride and gathered princess autographs. But my heart felt a little heavy as I watched our oldest daughter quietly walk down Main Street. I felt disappointed and silently chastised myself for believing that a theme park could be what brought this child the feeling of joy. She expressed gratefulness that we had brought her but she wasn’t overly animated or expressive as she watched the magic unfold around her.
What I didn’t know was that the magic wasn’t unfolding around her – it was unfolding inside of her.
I didn’t know it then, but joy was waiting for her when our log went flying down Splash Mountain. Joy was hiding behind the curtain that the princesses came out from; joy was in Elsa’s arms as she hugged her while cameras flashed. Joy was floating all around us when I leaned over to her during It’s A Small World and whispered that the ride looked the same as when I rode it as a little girl. Joy looked an awful lot like her first Mickey Mouse ice cream bar as it dripped down her hands. Joy chased her through Space Mountain and helped her score points with Buzz Lightyear’s help. Late that night, joy lit up the night sky much brighter than any fireworks ever could. As I watched her face in the glow of those fireworks I knew that, even if she didn’t know what word to assign to the emotion she was experiencing for the first time, I did.
After the fireworks ended, we made our way to the parking lot and took our place in line waiting for a bus back to our resort. We had been in line for a few minutes when I felt a tug at my shirt and turned to see her quietly crying next to me. I quickly bent down to her level and asked her what was wrong as I brushed the tears off her face only to hear her say words that made my heart soar:
“I think this is what joy must feel like.”
Critics might say that a parking lot is the unlikeliest of places for Disney magic to happen but they don’t know what you and I know – that the real magic of Disney isn’t found on Main Street or in a gift shop or even on any ride in the parks. The true magic of Disney is what happens inside of you when wonder and hope begin to take root and you start to believe that anything can happen with a little bit of magic.

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SOMETHING FISHY

 


SOMETHING FISHY
(author unknown)

After 37 years of marriage, Jake dumped his wife for his young secretary.
His new girlfriend demanded that they live in Jake and Edith’s multi-million dollar home. Since the man's lawyers were better, he prevailed.

He gave Edith, now his ex-wife, just three days to move out. She spent the first day packing her belongings into boxes, crates, and suitcases.

On the second day, she hired movers to come and collect her things.

On the third day, she sat down for the last time at their beautiful dining room table by candlelight, put on some soft background music, and feasted on a pound of shrimp, a jar of caviar, and a bottle of Chardonnay.

When she had finished eating, she went into each and every room and stuffed half-eaten shrimp shells dipped in caviar into the hollow of all of the curtain rods. She then cleaned up the kitchen and left.

When Jake returned with his new girlfriend, all was bliss for the first few days.

Then, slowly the house began to smell. They tried their best to clean, mop, and air the place out. Vents were checked for dead rodents and carpets were cleaned. Air fresheners were hung everywhere. Exterminators were brought in to set off gas canisters. During this time the couple had to move out for a few days.
In the end, they even had to replace the expensive wool carpeting. Nothing worked.

Their friends stopped coming over to visit. Repairmen refused to work in the house. Even the maid quit.

Finally, they could not take the stench any longer and decided to move.
A month later, they still couldn’t find a buyer for their house, which now reeked heavily.

Word about the house got out, and eventually even the local realtors refused to return their calls. Finally, they had to borrow a huge sum of money from the bank to purchase a new place.

The ex-wife called the man and asked how things were going. He told her of the rotting state the house was in. She listened politely and said that she missed her old home terribly.

She then said that she would be willing to reduce her divorce settlement if the house was returned to her.

Knowing his ex-wife had no idea how bad the smell was, he agreed on a price that was about 10 percent of what the house had been worth, but only if she were to sign the papers that very day.

She agreed, and within the hour his lawyers delivered the paperwork.

A week later, the man and his girlfriend stood smiling as they watched the moving company pack everything to take to their new home.

They even took the curtain rods. Hahahaha!

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THE LITTLE HAMMER

 


THE LITTLE HAMMER
(author unknown)

A giant ship's engine broke down and no one could repair it, so they hired a Mechanical Engineer with over 30 years of experience.
He inspected the engine very carefully, from top to bottom. After seeing everything, the engineer unloaded his bag and pulled out a small hammer.
He knocked something gently. Soon, the engine came to life again. The engine has been fixed!
A week later the engineer mentioned to the ship owner that the total cost of repairing the giant ship was $20,000.
"What?!" said the owner.
"You did almost nothing. Give us a detailed bill."
The answer is simple:
Tap with a hammer: $2
Know where to knock and how much to knock: $19,998
The importance of appreciating one's expertise and experience...because those are the results of struggles, experiments and even tears.
If I do a job in 30 minutes it's because I spent 20 years learning how to do that in 30 minutes. You owe me for the years, not the minutes.

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Sunday, 25 June 2023

Because of Love

 



Because of Love... (author unknown)
A brother and sister had made their usual hurried, obligatory pre-Christmas visit to the little farm where dwelt their elderly parents with their small herd of horses. The farm was where they had grown up and had been named Lone Pine Farm because of the huge pine, which topped the hill behind the farm. Through the years the tree had become a talisman to the old man and his wife, and a landmark in the countryside. The young siblings had fond memories of their childhood here, but the city hustle and bustle added more excitement to their lives, and called them away to a different life.
The old folks no longer showed their horses, for the years had taken their toll, and getting out to the barn on those frosty mornings was getting harder, but it gave them a reason to get up in the mornings and a reason to live. They sold a few foals each year, and the horses were their reason for joy in the morning and contentment at day's end.
Angry, as they prepared to leave, the young couple confronted the old folks "Why do you not at least dispose of The Old One? She is no longer of use to you. It's been years since you've had foals from her. You should cut corners and save so you can have more for yourselves. How can this old worn out horse bring you anything but expense and work? Why do you keep her anyway?"
The old man looked down at his worn boots, holes in the toes, scuffed at the barn floor and replied, "Yes, I could use a pair of new boots. His arm slid defensively about the Old One's neck as he drew her near with gentle caressing he rubbed her softly behind her ears. He replied softly, "We keep her because of love. Nothing else, just love."
Baffled and irritated, the young folks wished the old man and his wife a Merry Christmas and headed back toward the city as darkness stole through the valley. The old couple shook their heads in sorrow that it had not been a happy visit. A tear fell upon their cheeks. How is it that these young folks do not understand the peace of the love that filled their hearts?
So it was, that because of the unhappy leave-taking, no one noticed the insulation smouldering on the frayed wires in the old barn. None saw the first spark fall. None but the "Old One".
In a matter of minutes, the whole barn was ablaze and the hungry flames were licking at the loft full of hay. With a cry of horror and despair, the old man shouted to his wife to call for help as he raced to the barn to save their beloved horses.. But the flames were roaring now, and the blazing heat drove him back. He sank sobbing to the ground, helpless before the fire's fury. His wife back from calling for help cradled him in her arms, clinging to each other, they wept at their loss.
By the time the fire department arrived, only smoking, glowing ruins were left, and the old man and his wife, exhausted from their grief, huddled together before the barn. They were speechless as they rose from the cold snow covered ground. They nodded thanks to the firemen as there was nothing anyone could do now.
The old man turned to his wife, resting her white head upon his shoulders as his shaking old hands clumsily dried her tears with a frayed red Bandana. Brokenly he whispered, "We have lost much, but God has spared our home on this eve of Christmas. Let us gather strength and climb the hill to the old pine where we have sought comfort in times of despair. We will look down upon our home and give thanks to God that it has been spared and pray for our beloved most precious gifts that have been taken from us.
And so, he took her by the hand and slowly helped her up the snowy hill as he brushed aside his own tears with the back of his old and withered hand.
The journey up the hill was hard for their old bodies in the steep snow. As they stepped over the little knoll at the crest of the hill, they paused to rest, looking up to the top of the hill the old couple gasped and fell to their knees in amazement at the incredible beauty before them.
Seemingly, every glorious, brilliant star in the heavens was caught up in the glittering, snow-frosted branches of their beloved pine, and it was aglow with heavenly candles. And poised on its top most bough, a crystal crescent moon glistened like spun glass. Never had a mere mortal created a Christmas tree such as this. They were breathless as the old man held his wife tighter in his arms.
Suddenly, the old man gave a cry of wonder and incredible joy. Amazed and mystified, he took his wife by the hand and pulled her forward. There, beneath the tree, in resplendent glory, a mist hovering over and glowing in the darkness was their Christmas gift. Shadows glistening in the night light.
Bedded down about the "Old One" close to the trunk of the tree, was the entire herd, safe.
At the first hint of smoke, she had pushed the door ajar with her muzzle and had led the horses through it. Slowly and with great dignity, never looking back, she had led them up the hill, stepping cautiously through the snow. The foals were frightened and dashed about. The skittish yearlings looked back at the crackling, hungry flames, and tucked their tails under them as they licked their lips and hopped like rabbits. The mares that were in foal with a new years crop of babies, pressed uneasily against the "Old One" as she moved calmly up the hill and to safety beneath the pine. And now, she lay among them and gazed at the faces of the old man and his wife.
Those she loved she had not disappointed. Her body was brittle with years, tired from the climb, but the golden eyes were filled with devotion as she offered her gift---
Because of love. Only Because of love.

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Saturday, 24 June 2023

THE OLD FARMER

 


THE OLD FARMER
(author Chima Dickson)

There was a successful old farmer who grew tomatoes for many years. One day, his grandson told him.
"Grandfather, I want to achieve great things in life and make all of my dreams come true. What are the things I should avoid?"
The farmer paused for a moment and said.
"First of all, you should avoid procrastination. Secondly, you should never be afraid to fall. Thirdly, don't ever fool yourself. But the most important of them all, I won't tell you yet"
The boy asked.
"Why grandfather?"
The farmer responded.
"I will tell you at the appropriate time"
One week later, the farmer took his grandson to his tomato field for the first time. He showed him a large portion of land where he grew some of his tomatoes. When the farmer saw how amazed the little boy was, he asked him.
"How do you see them?"
The boy replied.
"They look very healthy. Their stems are solid, their leaves are green and their fruits are smooth and red"
The farmer smiled. Then he took him to a separate small portion of his tomato plants, and said to him.
"How about these ones? Can you compare them to the others?"
The boy shook his head and said.
"They don't look healthy. Their stems are weak, their leaves are yellow and they haven't developed any fruit yet. What do you think is the reason?"
The farmer uttered.
"That's because they are surrounded by unwanted plants called weeds. These weeds compete with the main plants for nutrients in the soil, leading to stunted growth for the plants"
Then the farmer held his grandson on his shoulders, looked at him in the eye, and said.
"Now is the appropriate time to answer your question completely. The most important thing you should avoid to become successful in life are negative people. These people are like the weeds and they would stunt your development and stop you from reaching your dreams. They have nothing to offer as they wallow in their problems and fail to focus on solutions. They are energy suckers and you will feel drained being around them. So you shouldn't surround yourself with such kind of people. Be around people who bring a smile to your face, fill your heart with joy and push you toward greatness. Choose your friends wisely and they will never put you down.

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THE BAD TEMPERED BOY

 


THE BAD TEMPERED BOY
(author unknown)

There once was a young boy with a very bad temper. The boy’s father wanted to teach him a lesson, so he gave him a bag of nails and told him that every time he lost his temper he must hammer a nail into their wooden fence.

On the first day of this lesson, the little boy had driven 37 nails into the fence. He was really mad!

Over the course of the next few weeks, the little boy began to control his temper, so the number of nails that were hammered into the fence dramatically decreased.

It wasn’t long before the little boy discovered it was easier to hold his temper than to drive those nails into the fence.

Then, the day finally came when the little boy didn’t lose his temper even once, and he became so proud of himself, he couldn’t wait to tell his father.

Pleased, his father suggested that he now pull out one nail for each day that he could hold his temper.

Several weeks went by and the day finally came when the young boy was able to tell his father that all the nails were gone.

Very gently, the father took his son by the hand and led him to the fence.

“You have done very well, my son,” he smiled, “but look at the holes in the fence. The fence will never be the same.”

The little boy listened carefully as his father continued to speak.

“When you say things in anger, they leave permanent scars just like these. And no matter how many times you say you’re sorry, the wounds will still be there”.

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ONLY ONE SHOE

 


ONLY ONE SHOE
(author unknown)
A weak old man walked into a shoe store and asked for the price of a pair of shoes. After making his payment, he asked the sales person.
"Could you please show me your trash can?"
She responded.
"Right over there on the left"
The old man then walked towards the bin and dumped one of the shoes he just bought into it.
The sales person saw what he did and broke into uncontrollable giggles. She knew obviously that the old man was drunk. She mocked him and watched him leave the store with only one of the shoes.
The following week, the old man visited the shoe store again to buy another pair of shoes. Having recognized him, the sales person watched him carefully, waiting to see his next silly act. As soon as he paid for the new shoes, he moved towards the garbage bin and threw away one of the shoes, repeating his previous act.
The sales person wouldn't stop laughing at him. When the old man noticed that he was being teased, he felt miserable and left the store with only one shoe.
One week later, the old man came to the store for the third time. But this time around, the sales person had no option but to confront him.
"We don't have any shoes for you, drunk old man" she declared.
The man said calmly.
"But why? I have never owed you money"
The lady scoffed.
"Now listen here drunk old man, I have reported you to my boss, and he said we shouldn't let dumb people like you visit our store. So can you leave now?"
Just then, the store owner arrived and saw the two individuals having a little argument. The sales person was quick to give an explanation, blaming the old man. But on a quest to hear the other side of the story, the store owner asked the old man.
"Why do you always dump one of your shoes in our store?"
The old man paused for a moment, with tears in his eyes, he began to speak.
"When I lost my wife many years ago, I had to raise our only son all by myself. Luckily, he grew up into a bright young man and was the most hardworking and smartest person I knew. I sent him to college, and he made me very proud by graduating with honours. Later on, he worked as a computer engineer and won numerous awards in the course of his employment. But all of a sudden, tragedy struck and changed my son's life forever. Few months to his wedding, three years ago, he had a car accident and lost both his upper limbs and one of his legs. It hurts me so much as a father, and hurts me even more knowing that all my son's dreams in life had been terminated. Now, whenever I buy him shoes, I always discard the other pair because my son has only one foot".
Moral Of The Story:
Do not be too quick in judging other people. Every single person on the planet has a story, so don't judge or criticize anyone without having full knowledge of what they are going through.

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"A VERY MERRY CHRISTMAS MARKET, NOT"

"A VERY MERRY CHRISTMAS MARKET, NOT" (author unknown) Is there anything less festive than the Christmas markets? Thousands of piss...