"CRUISE SHIP DIARY"
(author unknown)
DEAR DIARY - DAY 1
All packed for the cruise ship -- all my nicest dresses, swimsuits, short sets. Really, really exciting. Our local Red Hat chapter – The Late Bloomers decided on this "all-girls" trip.
It will be my first one - and I can't wait!
DEAR DIARY - DAY 2
The entire day at sea was beautiful. Saw whales and dolphins. Met the Captain today -- seems like a very nice man.
DEAR DIARY - DAY 3
At the pool today. Did some shuffleboard, and hit golf balls off the deck. The Captain invited me to join him at his table for dinner.
Felt honoured and had a wonderful time. He is very attractive and attentive.
DEAR DIARY - DAY 4
Won $800.00 in the ship's casino. The Captain asked me to have dinner with him in his own cabin. Had a scrumptious meal complete with caviar and champagne. He asked me to stay the night, but I declined. Told him I could not be unfaithful to my husband.
DEAR DIARY - DAY 5
Pool again today. Got sunburned, and I went inside to drink at the piano bar, and stayed there for the rest of the day. The Captain saw me, and bought me several large drinks. Really is quite charming. Again asked me to visit his cabin for the night. Again I declined.
He told me, if I did not let him have his way with me, he would sink the ship... I was shocked.
DEAR DIARY - DAY 6
Today I saved 2600 lives. Twice